Look at me

Audio version here

It’s what we are unconsciously saying  to people when we go out and about --- that is---- unless we are consciously saying something else !


Basic instinct makes us look for and retain a mate in order to continue our bloodline; over the millennia this has been modified as we have become more sophisticated in human society, but at the root of what we do are those original motivators.

So  !

The image you project either consciously or unconsciously says a lot about you, the way you feel, the way you want to be perceived.

Young people feel the need or desire to express their personality by identifying with certain genres of music, with this comes an image that tells others where your musical allegiances lie.

This is no new phenomena, Teddy boys , Hippies, Skinheads, Mods and Rockers, Goths, and Emo’s. All have a full back story around attitudes , beliefs and politics that is expressed by a style of clothing.  It goes further, the style then dictates the body language the swagger of the Skinhead compared with the languid  image of a Hippy.

These are examples of the conscious expressions but on a different level individuals have an image that is there either to protect, promote, insulate or make them invisible. Take for example the rape victim who eats and eats to put on massive amounts of weight so that no one will find them attractive enough to attack in the future---that is not ( Probably) a conscious action but an example of the way the subconscious acts to protect the individual. Clearly the mind is a complex but also ingenious entity


So the first point is--- how do you develop and then  project the image that enables you to do the things you want or to be the person you want to be. The outward signs are easy, look at those who have the image you wish to project , look at the clothes they wear, the cars they drive, the places they go to be seen. That is the easy part but it will be “seen through” very quickly if you do not have the attitudes, opinions, beliefs, aspirations that people with that image have. Further more you need to be able to believe in yourself; do you really want that image, what will it do for you, what do you have to give up to achieve it and is it worth it. Being true to yourself is very important, you can project an image at work of the go getting, highly professional manager as long as you remember who the real you is and that you give yourself time to be yourself away from work for example.pro


The second point is how do you identify the things that work against the image you wish to have? What are the things you are saying, doing, believing that stop you being who you want to be.

Non verbal communication is vastly important, people summarise and make decisions about each other before a word is spoken. How you feel about yourself is portrayed without you realising it. How many times has someone surprised you by asking “What’s wrong” or “Who upset you” when you  thought you were effectively masking your feelings?

It often helps to work through these issues with someone else, one that is objective and will be able to help you sort out who you are now and by how much and in what ways you need to adjust to become the new You.

Give me a call or email me , we can set up an appointment  and help you develop a clear  easy to manage plan.



© Martin Williams 2013/15/16